she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
