Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
