areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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