i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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