Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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