so let's talk penis.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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