Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
