She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
