You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
