the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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