I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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