I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
