eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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