Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
