so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
