I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
