david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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