I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
