A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
