A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
A bitchslap is in order.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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