remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
