Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
