so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
