I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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