If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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