So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
