How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
