You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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