Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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