he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
