So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
