Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
