Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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