Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Randomize