Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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