think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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