why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
