I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
