on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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