There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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