Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
