laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize