Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize