Small penises have feelings too.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
