Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Randomize
