I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
