we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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