the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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