So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
