At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
