She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
