tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
